I can relate being raised in a heavily dogmatic religion. Everything was from the devil, needless to say it left a person with very little to do outside of the church itself, not mentioning the discrimination to non believers. Unfortunately the fact that christianity is constantly changing is to serve their needs, except everything as long as it does not cost me directly...and so the contradictions and confusion grows. A system created for controle and nothing else. Hypocrisy in motion.
Yes! The manipulation continues on... So frustrating! Sorry to hear you grew up with this style of fear mongering, too ❤️🩹 looks like a lot of us can relate and are finding one another on Substack. Subscribed 👋
This piece captures something larger than one church or one family. What stayed with me was the confusion of a child trying to understand why the rules kept changing—why some forms of imagination were dangerous until suddenly they weren't.
The contrast between being welcomed and truly belonging is especially powerful, because it exposes a distinction many institutions would rather leave unexamined...
I can feel the emotion in your writing. Thanks for sharing this! Personally, my parents had never let me read Harry Potter or even play with Pokemon cards…satanic panic is alive and well
I feel this one! When we're raised in religion, we learn to see through that singular lens. I was a young adult before I learned that I was raised with crazy, false beliefs. Everything good was sent "from the lord", anything they didn't like was "of Satan". It was weaponized to create an in group/out group dynamic. I used to believe that god loved me enough to change red lights when I was in a hurry. It never occurred to me that I should wonder WHY that mattered to him, but the starving kids weren't important. It's the whole "personal relationship" schtick-inherently selfish. It really messes with our minds, and I am still in therapy today because of it.
"Personal Relationship," yes!!! My ex pastor LOVED this control tactic. He targeted, openly, people with family issues. Once he got a room filled with broken families, he made God their true, perfect Father figure to "heal" what our real families did to us. He never lets us down and longs deeply for a personal relationship with us.... Bam!! That's all I ever wanted and I was a kid.
Immediately, I'm hooked. I wish there was an amazingly perfect god who loved me the way I deserved, but that's not what I got. I'm choosing to face it, get shittons of therapy, struggle through it, and keep my sanity. I wouldn't have known genuine love had I chosen the tactic, but I left and people love me for just me now. I'll take that any day, even if it means admitting my family could and should have done better.
I'm tough, as I think you are. We can heal from this ❤️🩹
I read all of it and really enjoyed it Lilitu. Recently I have come to become very interested in what the Ethiopian bible says about what Jesus said when he came back from the dead. Basically what I have always believed. Our conscience is God, not churches, power, control etc etc. We can either choose to be decent or choose to allow our darkness control us. We all have both, its not like it's a lottery..And I honestly dislike doing this immensely, but I honestly think you will like my book. It is vehemently anti-religious. Religion repeatedly tried to save me, control me, love me, hate me, shame me, and get rid of me.
Thanks far this! Oh, and I loved The Smurfs too, hehe
Interesting! Don't hate doing it!!! It's saved on my open browser to read, just haven't been able to slow down enough to read just yet. Just moved into a new place, so I'm slower than usual. Promise I'm planning to read it soon though!! You sold me on it 😊
I loved the scholastic book fairs so much, what a special memory of the erasers and pencils ✏️
Did your Dad ever explain why he didn't want books or tv? Of course it was all about control but curious what his reasoning was.
I liked the subtle reference that the Trans woman was saying they were helping her. Helping her with what? It felt like maybe they were "helping" her to become straight. Was that the message?
I loved the scholastic book fairs, too!! More than field trips. ✏️📚
No, my dad never explained his reasoning or why it changed. My parents just kinda does stuff, learns later what they did was bad, and then they just pretend to have known it all along. It's crazy making.
Yeah, I don't know what they helped her with. I assumed emotional or financial support, but I genuinely don't know. The church loves to target people in need. They use them as props for their believe system. It's just lies, traumatizing and using people who were just in need. Ugh
This is so similar to my family… we didn’t have cable or dish television until I was 16. I would sneak books and read them everyday until my father got home, and he would come to my room, take the book, and tell me to go to bed. It’s strange how they didn’t mind Harry Potter. Mother bought me the first of the series a few days before I turned 11, but she was afraid of us watching the Smurfs. We had a VHS tape of it that my sister and I were not allowed to watch. In high school I started running on the treadmill in the basement everyday, because I could watch that stupid Smurfs movie on mute and listen to Slayer on my headphones while I ran. I’d watch it over and over, my mother thinking I was just running in the basement, the treadmill “too loud” to hear her, when in reality it was the forbidden Satanic metal I was listening to that blocked her out. 🤘🏼
It's amazing how many of us experienced this parenting style from the satanic panic! So many of us!! I love that you fought back, too. It was hidden in the basement, but your curiosity for life was nourished at least internally! I love that 😊 thanks for reading and commenting ❤️🩹 to your freedom ⛓️💥 🥂
Well it speaks volumes to how devastating the panic was. This was after the year 2000! And parents were still doing the same things! I’m glad those of us who did fight back got away from all that 🖤
I can relate being raised in a heavily dogmatic religion. Everything was from the devil, needless to say it left a person with very little to do outside of the church itself, not mentioning the discrimination to non believers. Unfortunately the fact that christianity is constantly changing is to serve their needs, except everything as long as it does not cost me directly...and so the contradictions and confusion grows. A system created for controle and nothing else. Hypocrisy in motion.
Yes! The manipulation continues on... So frustrating! Sorry to hear you grew up with this style of fear mongering, too ❤️🩹 looks like a lot of us can relate and are finding one another on Substack. Subscribed 👋
This piece captures something larger than one church or one family. What stayed with me was the confusion of a child trying to understand why the rules kept changing—why some forms of imagination were dangerous until suddenly they weren't.
The contrast between being welcomed and truly belonging is especially powerful, because it exposes a distinction many institutions would rather leave unexamined...
Exactly! As a child, the inconsistency didn't help at all! Thanks so much for reading and for the thoughtful comment! Subscribed to you 😊
Thanks a lot:) I truly appreciate it
I can feel the emotion in your writing. Thanks for sharing this! Personally, my parents had never let me read Harry Potter or even play with Pokemon cards…satanic panic is alive and well
Pokemon cards!!! I totally forgot they were evil too! It's so interesting how anything fun for kids is sinful...
Yes, and reasoning? Evolution lol
Ohhhh, evolution! That fits the crazy logic 🤦♀️
I feel this one! When we're raised in religion, we learn to see through that singular lens. I was a young adult before I learned that I was raised with crazy, false beliefs. Everything good was sent "from the lord", anything they didn't like was "of Satan". It was weaponized to create an in group/out group dynamic. I used to believe that god loved me enough to change red lights when I was in a hurry. It never occurred to me that I should wonder WHY that mattered to him, but the starving kids weren't important. It's the whole "personal relationship" schtick-inherently selfish. It really messes with our minds, and I am still in therapy today because of it.
"Personal Relationship," yes!!! My ex pastor LOVED this control tactic. He targeted, openly, people with family issues. Once he got a room filled with broken families, he made God their true, perfect Father figure to "heal" what our real families did to us. He never lets us down and longs deeply for a personal relationship with us.... Bam!! That's all I ever wanted and I was a kid.
Immediately, I'm hooked. I wish there was an amazingly perfect god who loved me the way I deserved, but that's not what I got. I'm choosing to face it, get shittons of therapy, struggle through it, and keep my sanity. I wouldn't have known genuine love had I chosen the tactic, but I left and people love me for just me now. I'll take that any day, even if it means admitting my family could and should have done better.
I'm tough, as I think you are. We can heal from this ❤️🩹
I read all of it and really enjoyed it Lilitu. Recently I have come to become very interested in what the Ethiopian bible says about what Jesus said when he came back from the dead. Basically what I have always believed. Our conscience is God, not churches, power, control etc etc. We can either choose to be decent or choose to allow our darkness control us. We all have both, its not like it's a lottery..And I honestly dislike doing this immensely, but I honestly think you will like my book. It is vehemently anti-religious. Religion repeatedly tried to save me, control me, love me, hate me, shame me, and get rid of me.
Thanks far this! Oh, and I loved The Smurfs too, hehe
Interesting! Don't hate doing it!!! It's saved on my open browser to read, just haven't been able to slow down enough to read just yet. Just moved into a new place, so I'm slower than usual. Promise I'm planning to read it soon though!! You sold me on it 😊
I loved the scholastic book fairs so much, what a special memory of the erasers and pencils ✏️
Did your Dad ever explain why he didn't want books or tv? Of course it was all about control but curious what his reasoning was.
I liked the subtle reference that the Trans woman was saying they were helping her. Helping her with what? It felt like maybe they were "helping" her to become straight. Was that the message?
I loved the scholastic book fairs, too!! More than field trips. ✏️📚
No, my dad never explained his reasoning or why it changed. My parents just kinda does stuff, learns later what they did was bad, and then they just pretend to have known it all along. It's crazy making.
Yeah, I don't know what they helped her with. I assumed emotional or financial support, but I genuinely don't know. The church loves to target people in need. They use them as props for their believe system. It's just lies, traumatizing and using people who were just in need. Ugh
This is so similar to my family… we didn’t have cable or dish television until I was 16. I would sneak books and read them everyday until my father got home, and he would come to my room, take the book, and tell me to go to bed. It’s strange how they didn’t mind Harry Potter. Mother bought me the first of the series a few days before I turned 11, but she was afraid of us watching the Smurfs. We had a VHS tape of it that my sister and I were not allowed to watch. In high school I started running on the treadmill in the basement everyday, because I could watch that stupid Smurfs movie on mute and listen to Slayer on my headphones while I ran. I’d watch it over and over, my mother thinking I was just running in the basement, the treadmill “too loud” to hear her, when in reality it was the forbidden Satanic metal I was listening to that blocked her out. 🤘🏼
It's amazing how many of us experienced this parenting style from the satanic panic! So many of us!! I love that you fought back, too. It was hidden in the basement, but your curiosity for life was nourished at least internally! I love that 😊 thanks for reading and commenting ❤️🩹 to your freedom ⛓️💥 🥂
Well it speaks volumes to how devastating the panic was. This was after the year 2000! And parents were still doing the same things! I’m glad those of us who did fight back got away from all that 🖤